a note from Danielle

It's beensnowing and blowing again here in southern Ontario, a great night for snuggling by the fire with a movie and that special someone. Although I don't like the cold much, I do enjoy these stormy days. They make me appreciate my warm home, so I usually celebrate by loading the slow cooker with some comfort food. Nothing like the smell of a good stew cooking to help you feel warm and cozy. My family asked for some chocolate cake, so we'll get the oven going with more good smells very soon.

Our sense of smells is more important to us than we think.. Spirit will often use an odor to indicate its presence because smells evoke such deep and often instant reactions within us. My sister tells the story of being embarrassed when she was caught following a man for several blocks - he was smoking a pipe and she couldn't resist the smell of that special brand of charry flavoured tobacco that my father used to love. I associate certain lovely smells with my mother who has always enjoyed scented bath oils. Smell often reminds us of special people. In some circles, it is said that our sense of smell plays a significant role in finding the right mate in life - I'm not sure about that... but then, I never did like my ex husband's smell, his hair had a peculiar oily odor that I could never get used to... smell is just one of many signals that can clue you in to whether a relationship can work in the long run.

This is Heart month, so I am publishing a series of articles on love and relationship and the role that psychic can play in making relationships work - or not. So many of our previous series on Love have focused on the nature of love, the power of love, the question of soul mates, that it seemed we have set the stage now to speak directly about actually "reading" relationships. I am amazed at how often my clients ignore the cues that let them know where a relationship is going, or what is wrong or right about it. So, I thought the first article in this series needed to be about noticing the signs that indicate whether love is truly present and if it can grow into a loving partnership for life - or is simply leading to a warm and inspiring friendship.

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Table Of Contents
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Use of any material contained herein requires written permission of the authors.

1~~ Remembering Love? -a Meditation

2~~The Love Connection - On Reading Relationships

3 - Reminders and Reviews

Meet Our Readers

Our Columns

Our Blog- updated weekly

Advice from the Love Psychics - on Love and Relationships

Advice from the Psychic - about Paranormal events and being psychic

Advice from the Medium - about Spirit Life, Channeling, Meditation

Advice from Laura - about Animal Communications

1~~Remembering Love - A Meditation  

Please start this meditation with taking a few deep breaths in through your nose for positivity and out through your mouth knowing this is letting out any negativity you have right now… as you inhale and exhale each breath… you can feel yourself becoming more and more relaxed, your shoulders begin to drop, your face becomes nice and loose, your chest, your tummy, your hips, legs, every part of you sinks deeper and deeper into relaxation… really feel this and go with what you feel, know you are very safe and feel totally at ease and getting ready to take a little walk in this lovely brisk day…

In your minds eye start by visualizing this figure beside you, you are quite surprised however when you turn around to your left side you know who this is… your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend… so you give them this most beautiful and loving smile… your partner then looks at you, eyes sparkling and the love just flowing from you both… you each take each others hand and start to walk forward…. You both keep looking at each other as you walk and the love you feel from each other is almost unworkable as you haven’t felt this way with each other in a long time, the nerves in your tummy, the butterflies, remember all these feelings and feel the way you are now, really at awe and amazement you both are very happy and there is no worries, stress… only love between you….

While you both continue walking you both feel like you are walking on air… amazing this is… both of you are laughing, joking, talking and want this feeling to last forever and it can as you are both noticing things about each other that you never seen or felt… looking around you, look at all the beautiful flowers… there are that many you can smell them very vividly and ones stands out in particular, you keep looking at this one flower in particular and when you turn to your partner… he/she has something in their hand and behind their back… you can’t help but smile as you feel so much love and contentment…. Your partner reaches from behind him and hands you this most beautiful rose you have ever seen in your life… as you look at , you see this rose shining … you look up to your partner and he/she knows exactly what you are thinking and how pleased you are with this one flower…

As you both continue walking, flowers everywhere, trees everywhere, sun shining although is a little nippy …. A slight breeze and you feel your hair going with this slight breeze… feel this on your face too, both of you, it’s a gorgeous feeling… this place is like a miracle as the love felt here is something you haven’t felt before… you feel that excited you want to shout out “come here to this most beautiful place you will ever see !”

You and your partner keep walking and talking and notice your breathing, going at a nice relaxing pace, you haven’t felt so much peace ever in your life… this truly is like a miracle, you start to see little animals running about and as they do, they sound like they are singing which makes you feel so warm in your heart…

You both keep talking and joking with each other while these little animals run about and before you know it… you both start to see not one but a lot of people coming towards you, keep walking up towards these people and as you get closer…. You start to run a little towards them as you notice these people are either family or friends you haven’t seen for a very long time… tears wielding up in your eyes, you all have a big group hug, feel the love from your family and friends truly amazing, a lot of these people have tears in their eyes but these are not sad tears! They are happy ones… your partner can’t believe it either that there are people he/she has also not seen in a very long time, so you all walk together and find this one spot where you can all sit down and talk to each other…. Its like this bench has just appeared and is room for you all to sit …. You all start talking , catching up with each other, and feel so happy that you really could stay here forever however there is one thing you start to realize as you all talk and laugh amongst each other…

You already do have this at home, in real life with your friends and family and you have just realized also that life is too short and from now on you are going to make an effort to stay in touch with your friends and family as you really didn’t know how much you missed them until today, until now!

Give yourself some time a few minutes to talk and joke with your friends and family, take just a few minutes to say the words you’ve always wanted to say ….

This really is unbelievable and you do feel you are dreaming at times although you aren’t but the feelings of happiness, peace, love, calmness that you feel; you want to keep and you can … remember them, keep them with you until you are back from this magnificent place…

You are all laughing and joking and being in this place has made you all realize that you all share this love and that no matter what, you all love each other… even when times are hard and you feel like giving up, always remember you are very much loved and grip these feelings and tell yourself you are bringing them back with you to the real world and you will….

It is now time to say goodbye to your family and friends and know that you will be seeing a lot more of each other than you have done in a long, long time… you all give each a beautiful hug and as you do, your family and friends begin to run around again and start walking forwards although it is now time for you to come back so you turn around and start walking with your partner again….

You will never forget this place as this has truly felt like a miraculous occasion and you are going to bring all those feelings you feel back with you… also you will bring back all the feelings you and your partner shared and hold tight onto them for when you get back…. Keep hold of these feelings, thoughts with you and never ever forget them as you have also learnt a lesson on your journey….

Life is short so share your love with as many as you can, see your friends and family as often as you can and love your partner again the way you have felt during this journey, and most of all… remember you are a child of god and need to start loving yourself more ….

Ok now is the time that you need to come back, so to do this please take another few deep breaths, nice and slow and deep…. Start to become aware of your surroundings (please take this slowly) and as you do you notice you are still feeling the way you felt on your journey, be very proud of yourself for bringing it back with you and you also notice when you are fully back in your own surroundings , in your right hand you are holding your rose that your partner give you… you are astounded but at the same time you don’t question how, you just know that this was meant to be….

Now that you are fully aware of your own surroundings, please take wee sips of water…..

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2~~ The Love Connection

Too often, one of the messages I must deliver in a relationship reading is "you saw this coming months ago, but chose to overlook the signs. Perhaps now you will trust those uneasy feelings within you." The signs are obvious in hindsight. A painful breakdown might have been avoided if the client had acknowledged and reacted to the red flags that had been waving in the background.

So what are these subtle signs and signals, the green, amber and red flags that tell us whether a relationship is right for us? How DO you accurately read a relationship? There are some clear indicators, obvious cues. You just have to be willing to notice them.

Signs that you shouldn't hang your hat on this one:

While theses signals may not mean that a relationship can never work, they do indicate where work must be done if you want a healthy long-lasting commitment. Here are some clues to look for.

1) Not making space. I spoke with a woman recently whose partner had frequently complained about not feeling comfortable in her home, even after more than three years together. She had finally consented to sell, deposited money to build a new home - a move which she never felt good about.. he moved out anyway. Now she was struggling to get her deposit back. There were good reasons why she had been so unwilling to open and share her space with him, good reason also for her resistance to moving. The financial loss that ensued from her refusing to trust her intuition, to notice how they were living - together, but separately - would be a good reminder for the rest of her life to trust herself. She had known all along that this wasn't the right partner for her, but as so many do, she kept hoping he would change.

I recall visiting a dear friend a year or so after she had married and was shocked to notice that there was very little indication of my friend's presence in her new husband's home, even after a year. The house was very cluttered, unusual for her, but the only items in the room that were hers were their wedding picture on the piano and one of her favourite paintings behind it. As I expected, within months, I got the call telling me the marriage had ended... he just couldn't make space for her in his life.

2) Only one of you is working on the relationship. If you're doing all of the reaching out, planning and organizing, this relationship is probably not happening... if you're something of a control freak, you prefer leading, and if your partner hates making decisions, happily goes along with whatever you want, then you've probably got a good partnership. Until the day comes when you're tired, or ill, or you've made a serious error in judgment and blown the family bank account. Then suddenly you realize that carrying the load all by yourself isn't so great afterall.

Relatonships need to be balanced so that each person feels they have some power and control, as well as the authority to make some decisions independently. Whenever there is a real imbalance, when one person is doing all the work to make the relationship work, eventually it will break down. If you're paying all of the bills and your partner is spending all of the money, you may want to take a second look at how you are feeling and whether you are truly happy. By the same token, if your heart's desire insists on making all the calls, arranging all of the dates, you need to think about making the next call yourself - otherwise you'll end up feeling powerless in the relationship.

3) Not mixing with friends and family. While it isn't necessary to like all of your potential partner's friends and family members, you each need to feel accepted in the other's family and friendships - and when you aren't being introduced to any of them - PAY ATTENTION... this could very well be the signal to tell you this relationship isn't going anywhere - or shouldn't be.

Notice also how much time the other spends with friends and family. A person who has few friends, and doesn't spend much time with family is probably not going to be a great contributor to a relationship. (And could in fact be an abuser. - abusive men and women try to isolate their victims from other relationships, even with close family members.) And on the opposite end of the scale, a man who spends every spare moment hanging with his buddies or a woman who just can't make a decision without first consulting three of her friends, her Mom and favourite aunt, is probably not going to pay a whole lot of attention to what you have to say.

4) It's hard to trust. When there appear to be a lot of secrets, or lies, or you're afraid to ask the hard questions, you're left constantly trying to "read" what the other will do or say, or think or feel. This leads to serious trust issues. Without trust, communications break down and this spells disaster for any relationship. You need to be able to freely speak what's on your mind and in your heart. And to trust that your partner is honest with you.

While you don't want to be asking the hard questions in the first weeks of getting to know each other, it is important that you get around to asking how the other feels about key values, such as religious beliefs, family, marriage and kids - if you want them.... and you must be able to trust that "what you see is what you get", in other words, that there is no baggage hidden in the wings.

There are a lot of other ways that you can tell whether a relationship will work in the long-term or not.

While the presence of any one of these signals does not mean that you should end the relationship and the sooner, the better, more than two or three of these "negative" signals, should suggest that you back off. Let the objective observer in you take over so you can float along for awhile. Give yourself time to acknowledge those uneasy feelings within. In this time you can consider your options, and decide whether it's worth negotiating a change in attitude.. or that it's time to let go..

Signs that this relationship is on its way to happily ever after,

The signs that a relationship is "right" are very simple: you're relaxed, it's easy, you work together well, you're not so concerned about outcome, where you're going doesn't matter so much as where you're at right now... There's real chemisty between you, but it isn't taking over your life... life in general is moving well - you just got a promotion, you're happy for no good reason... these are all good clues that something wonderful is working in your life, that love is flowing.

I found it interesting that I could easily write about the amber and red flags that come up around relationships, but there wasn't a whole lot to say about the green flags, the "go" signals. There is a simple reason why - when it's right, it's usually quite obvious... with no amber and red flags flying, the way forward is clear. While there may be obstacles ahead, the couple is aware of them and willing to face them together... the love connection really is that simple.

You don't have to be psychic to read relationships... you just have to be willing to notice the signs. The art of noticing suggests that you pay attention:

If you're spending your energy trying to read the object of your affections, instead of just enjoying being together, you probably need to think twice about this relationship... but when you're happy to take it as it comes, well, this could be that happily ever after partnership you've always dreamed about.

More on Love and Relationship

Love Psychics answer your questions about Love and Romance
Ask Our Love Psychics
On Being Confused About Love
Will He Still Talk To Me, Even Though I Lied?
Why can't I get a boy friend?
Finding the One, on Soul Mates

Tips on avoiding the quicksand in love and romance
On Loving and Listening
Opening to that New Relationship
Friends or Lovers, Which Comes First
Don't Make Mountains Out of Molehills, Ask Don't Read
Get a Life! Notes on the White Knight Syndrome

International Relationship Scams

The Dalai Lama's Loving Practice

Love, Neurochemistry, and Chocolate:  a Word from Cupid, Ph.D.

What's Wrong With Being Single?

The Power of Love
Discourse on Love
Love as a Mystical Experience, Living in Love
A Life of Passion

Love Needs the Right Environment

Loving Your Work

Serge Channeling Kris on Love

More Insights on Love and Romance
in our Love Stories .

Remarkable Love, Dating and Romance Links

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